Buffy
If the apocolypse comes, beep me
Seize the moment, cuz tomorrow you might be dead
Have you seen the kids who work on the yearbook? Nerds pick on them
Clark Kent has a day job, I just want to go on a date
Okay, at this point you're abusing sarcasm
I suppose some girls might find him good-looing...if they have eyes
Oh great, it's the winged monkeys
For us to have a conversation about guys, there has has to be a guy
to have a conversation about. Is that a sentence?
Great, you won't tell anyone I'm the slayer and I won't tell anyone
you're a moron
We were close. We killed each other. It really promotes togetherness
Your logic does not resemble our earth logic
What about me? I love you so much. I tried to make you go away. I
killed you and it didn't help. And I hate it! I hate that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did because
you did it to me. I wish that I wished you dead but I don't. I can't.
What about home-schooling? It's not just for scary religious people
anymore
You know I love art talk as much as the next dull person, but we have
work to do
How about testing my face punching skills cuz I think you'll find
it's improved
Couldn't this just be the vamp that got away? We could say he was
this big
Sometimes people surprise you
Fashion tip Wes: mouth looks better closed
It's all falling into place. Of ocurse that place is no where near
this place
'Gentleman of leisure'? Isn't that just British for unemployed?
I'm a little upset. I had it on good authority that this was a party
school
Part of me believes that real love and passion have to go hand in
hand with pain and fighting. I wonder where I get that from
Giles, help! He's gonna scold me
Fortune favors the brave
That probably would have sounded a lot more convincing if I wasn't
wearing my Yummy Sushi pajamas
Now, I don't generally like to kill humans but I've learned in life
that it pays to be flexible
Running your car into a tree is an accident. Running your fist into
someone's face is a plan
I mean, in the real world when am I ever gonna need to use chemistry,
math, history, or the English language
I pretty much repress anything math related
I'm suffering the after-ness of a bad night of badness
Judgmental? If I was any more open about the choices you two make
my entire brain would fall out
Angel/Angelus
Passion is the source of our finest moments. The joy of love, the
clarity of hatred, and the ecstacy of grief
It's like talking to a wall, only you get more from a wall
Sorry about the chains, it's not that I don't trust you - actually
it is that I don't trust you
I'm not evil again, why does everyone think that? I haven't been evil
for a long time
Don't believe everything you're foretold
Xander
You're having parental issues, you're having parental issues
Cavalry's here. Cavalary's a scared guy with a rock, but it's here
I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away
On a scale of one to ten, it sucked
I don't handle rejection well. Funny, considering all the practice
I've had
We're right behind you, only further back
It's funny how the earth never opens up and swallows you when you
want it to
Well I guess it could be worse. I could have gangrene on my
face
This is new territory for me. Usually my valentines are met with heartfelt
restraining orders
This isn't about looking at a bunch of animals, this is about not
being in class
Shoot me, stuff me, mount me
Having issues much?
Dog spit is cleaner than human
What is wrong with you? Don't you know she is the center of the universe
and we merely revolve around her?
Well it's funny if you're me
Bad thing? I was naked. 'Bad thing' doesn't cover it
We could grind our enemies into talcum powder but gosh we did that
last night
What if I'm a people person who keeps his own company by default?
Hey Larva Boy! That's right, I'm talking to you you big cootie!
What's the problem? We send Cordy to fight this guy and we go for
pizza
Nobody is asking you to go Cordelia.If the vampires need grooming
tips, we'll call you
It's the whole 'sex leads to responsibility' thing which I personally
don't get
Apparently Buffy's decided that the problem with the English language
is all those pesky words. You. Angel. Big. Smoochies.
Boy, somebody was raised in a culture-free environment
How is Angel? Pretend I care
Oh man Buff, my whole life just flashed before my eyes.
I gotta get me a life
Increased ookiness. That's a danger signal
They say young people don't learn anything in school, but I've learned
to be afraid
We're doing crime here! You don't sneak up during crime!
But that's why you love me, right? Academically dangerous
Hello, Nasty
Generally speaking, when scary things get scared, not good
Almost 65% of that was actual compliment, was that a personal best?
Cordelia, feel free to drop dead of a wasting disease in the next
20 seconds
On behalf of my gender, Hey!
Aw man, it's Nazi Germany and I have Playboys in my locker!
See, I've been saying for years that the lunch lady is gonna do us
all in with the Mulligan Stew. I mean, what the hell is a mulligan?
Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to anger. Wait,
hold on. Fear leads to hate. Hates elads to the dark side. No, wait, um, first you get the girl, then you get the money...Okay,
can we just forget that?
Nothing says thanks like dollars in the waistband
Funny how you still haven't lost your sense of inappropriate humor
I've seen Cocktail, I can do the hippey hippey shake shake
You're not the Big Bad anymore, you're not even a Kinda Naughty. You're
nothing but a waste of space. My space
That's why they call it the secrets forces Will, cuz they kinda keep
the whole lying thing to themselves
Great plan. That's right up there with 'Duck and cover'
That's it. This has gotta stop. It's time for me to act like a man.
And hide.
That's creepy on a level I never knew existed.
I defined something? Accurately? Check me out. Guess I'm done with
the book learning.
Willow
And suddenly I'm thinking 'sucking' isn't a good word to use around
vampires
I'm a rebel
Well I'm upset and I can't think of a mean word right now, but that's
what you are
That doesn't sound like making out...unless I'm doing it wrong
Okay, that's a little blacker than I like my art
Occasionally I am callous and strange
I'm not the most subjective, I know. I kind of have issues with Faith
sharing my people...
Buff, I'm storming off. It doesn't really work if you come with me
Yeah I'll give Xander a call. What's his number? Oh yeah, 1-800-I'm-Dating-A-Skanky-Ho
Hey Giles, I just talked to Buffy, and yeah I think she's feeling
kind of crazy. No, not bitchy-crazy, more like homocidal maniac crazy
And if Parker shows up, we'll ax-murder him. That's Halloween-y
I've seen honest faces before. They usually come attached to liars
Remember, if you hurt her I will beat you to death with a shovel
You failed extremely well
Any reaction is good, except projectile vomiting, but what're the
chances of that?
I don't get wild. Wild on me equals spaz.
Love makes you do the wacky
I eat danger for breakfast
I never knew anything inside me could feel this bad
I feel like a part of me will always be waiting for you. Like, if
I'm old and blue-haired and I turn a corner in Instanbul and there you are, I won't be surprised. Because you're with me,
you know?
Oz
Well yeah, I'm shot. It's odd. And painful
See, our band is moving toward the sound where we suck. So, practice
Okay, you know that thing where you have to bail in the middle of
an upsetting conversation? Well, I have to do that. It's kind of dramatic, but it's a necessary guy-thing
I've never felt that way. When there wasn't a full moon
It's like I lost an arm, or worse, a torse
It looks dead, it smells dead, yet it's moving around. That's interesting
A gathering is brie, mellow song-stylings. Shin-dig is dip, less mellow
song stylings, perhaps a large amount of malt beverage. And hootnanny, well that's chaulk full of hoot with just a little
bit of nanny.
I didn't know what to say. It's not every day you find out you're
a werewolf. That's fairly freaksome
Once again the Hellmouth puts the special in special occasion
Nobody deserves mime, Buffy
On the plus side you killed the bench, which was looking kind of shifty
Hippos wearing tutus don't unnerve me anymore
Cordelia
I'm thinking of you. Okay, I'm done
I don't need the looney fringe vote
Over-identify much?
She doesn't need this many stakes. If this Spike guy is as bad as
you all say, it should be over pretty quickly
Is it possible to have too much character?
And do what, besides be afraid and die?
Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass
Hello! How stupid are you people? She's a slayer, I'm a Homecoming
Queen
How about because you're a tiny, impotent Nazi with a bug up it's
butt the ize of an emu?
How many times have you been knocked out, anyway? I swear, one of
these days you're going to wake up in a coma
I have nothing! No dresses, no cell phone, no car! Everything has
been taken away because Daddy made a little mistake on his taxes...For the last 12 years
This is really one of those times I should just shy away from the
topic, isn't it?
People who think their problems are so huge craze me. Like the time
I sort of an over this girl with my bike, and it was the most traumatizing event of my life, and she's trying to make it all
about her leg! Like my pain meant nothing.
I think you splashed on a little too much 'Obsession for Dorks'
God, what is your childhood trauma?!
I don't see why everyone is always ragging on Marie Antoinette. I
can relate to her. She worked really hard to look that good. People don't appreciate that kind of effort.
Being popular is not just my right. It's my responsibility.
Great. Now I'm going to be stuck with serious thoughts all day.
Giles
I'll just jump in my time machine, go back to the 12th century, and
ask the vampirs to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days whil you take in dinner and a show
Form a circle. But there's only two of us. That's really more of a
line
Xander, don't speak Latin in front of the books.
Do you want me to answer that, or shall I just glare?
Spike
I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it
Well it's a big rock. I can't wait to tell all my friends, they
don't have a rock this big
It's paradise. Big windows, lovely gardens. It'll be perfect
when we want the sunlight to kill us
It's a good thing no one cares what you think
I fed on a flower person once and spent the next six hours watching
my hand move
I'm surrounded by idiots
Well, yeah, it's interesting to me that preparing looks a great deal
like sitting on your ass
You're not friends, you'll never be friends. You be in love til it
kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag and you'll hate each other til it makes you both quiver, but you'll never be
friends. Love isn't brains children, it's blood, blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at
least I'm man enough to admit it
Love's a funny thing
Harmony, does this look like a good time to talk?
A bear! You made a bear! Undo it! Undo it!
This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply ashamed
What, you think I'd come running over here saying 'I've got a secret,
beat me til I talk?'
Extras
There's moments in your life that make you, that set the course of
who you're gonna be. Sometimes they're little subtle moments, sometimes they're not - Whistler
Bottom line is, even if you see'em coming, you're not ready for the
big moments. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are
gonna come, you can't change that. It's what you do afterward that counts. That's when you find out who you are. You'll see
what I mean - Whistler
In the end you're always by yourself. You're all you've got - Whistler
There are three kinds of people in this world that no one understands:
geniuses, madmen, and guys that mumble - Whistler
It's just that, you never really know what's going on inside somebody,
do you? You think if you care about them...but you never really do - Scott Hope
